


The Peculiar Luck of Dipper Pines

by CloversintheMoonlight



Category: Gravity Falls
Genre: Day 1 and 2 mashed up for BillDip week, M/M, first billdip fic please be gentle with me, highschool!au
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-02-15
Updated: 2016-02-15
Packaged: 2018-05-20 21:10:27
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,919
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6024982
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CloversintheMoonlight/pseuds/CloversintheMoonlight
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>All Dipper wanted was to write a letter. The day, however, had other things in store for him.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Peculiar Luck of Dipper Pines

   Dipper stared hopelessly at the mountain of balled up scraps of paper in front of him. The sight itself was nothing new; he’d fought writer’s block many times before and he hated it just as much then as he hated it now. No, what was really discouraging was that there shouldn’t have been any to begin with! After all, how hard was it to sit down and write a simple letter spilling his heart and guts out tot he only person that filled them both up with the increasingly annoying butterflies known as love?

   Mabel made this look so easy.

   Growling, he crumpled up his latest attempt before adding it to the pile. This was never going to work, he thought as he lay down on top of his mess with a sigh. Bits of paper dug into the side of his face but he was well passed the point of caring. In a moment of weakness he had spilled the truth about his not-so-secret crush to Mabel (not that he could ever really keep secrets from his twin) and then got so caught up in her pep talk that he hadn’t even stopped to realize that this was never going to work to begin with. After all, who’d ever be crazy enough to like him like that anyway? He was just an social awkward teen who spent too much time chasing mysteries and not enough time living in the ‘real world’. The other kids at school would never see the real him beyond that. The only one that did (excluding his sister) was his best friend, and he certainly wouldn’t be interested in being anything more than that. Not like Dipper…

   Getting up dejectedly, he grabbed his backpack, leaving the mess of scraps to be dealt with later. Maybe it was for the best. He certainly didn’t want to mess up the perfectly good friendship he already had. As long as he had the blonde in his life, that’s all that really mattered. He could live with what he had.

 

~,~’~,~’~,~’~,~

 

   Apparently what he had was really crappy luck.

   First it started with almost being late for his first class. His stupid locker had refused to shut properly, leaving him to make a mad dash for the classroom, barely squeezing by his disapproving calculus teacher as she was in the middle of locking it shut. Then he realized that the homework that was due today was still under the heap of discarded love letters in his room back at home. At that point he was positive that he’d officially made it onto the teacher’s black list, going off of the glare she was trying to burn through him which Bill would be over the moon about once he found out.

   To top it all off he hadn’t even seen Bill all morning. As much as the blonde detested school (insisting that it was all academically pointless anyway and was just an unfortunate side effect of humanity’s feeble attempts at social constructs) it was still unusual for him to skip without good cause. Especially without warning Dipper beforehand.

   As class let out for homeroom, Dipper shot him a quick text, if only to reassure himself that his best friend was still alive. Lower lip between his teeth, he tried not to worry too much. Emphasis on tried.

   By lunch, he was resigned to the fact that whatever Bill was doing, he wasn’t going to show up to school that day. With a heavy heart, Dipper sat himself down next to Mabel, holding in a sigh. Even if he wasn’t going to reveal his feelings, he had still hoped to see the mischievous blonde. Bill always managed to brighten his mood, whether he was aware of it or not.

   “So Dip-Dop, did you do the thing yet?” Mabel asked, elbowing him to get his attention.

   “Do what?” he replied warily.

   “Y’knooooooooow,” she drawled, leaning in close to stage-whisper. “ _The thing_. The letter _thing_. The lovey dovey goody goodness _thing_.”

   “Mabel,” Dipper groaned, pressing his face into the palms pf his hands.

   “C’mon bro bro! You gotta tell the Love Goddess everything! Don’t leave me hanging here!” Mabel insisted, pulling his hands away to pear at his slightly red face.

   “…..no, I didn’t do ‘the thing’,” he mumbled, refusing to look at her face.

   “Why not?!”

   “Because I couldn’t- the words wouldnt- look, it doesn’t really matter, okay?” Dipper stuttered. “Besides, it doesn’t really matter, Bill isn’t here today anyway.”

   “For glitter’s sake!” Mabel exclaimed, throwing her hands up in the air. “You boys could give even Cupid a run for his money!”

   “Keep it down!” Dipper hissed, glancing at the surrounding tables.

   “But Dipper, c’mon, how’re you ever gonna move forward if you keep making excuses? Love doesn’t have time for waiting!”

   “Time is an illusion,” Dipper said automatically, a reflex he had picked up from Bill.

   “Dipper.”

   “Look, i’m not making excuses,” Dipper said, pulling at the hem of his shirt. Looking at Mabel’s disbelieving expression he added, “Seriously, i’m not. I’m just… easing in to it. Give me a little more time to work with okay? We can’t all be love experts like you.”

   Mabel sighed. “That is true. It’s a heavy burden to bare, but I own up to it.” Nodding to herself, she smiled at her brother. “Alright Dipper, you do things your way. Just keep me in the loop, ‘kay?”

   Nodding with a small smile of his own, Dipper pulled out his lunch and slowly started to eat. The butterflies were ever present in his stomach, but he knew he’d be okay.

   Less than an hour later, he was decidedly far from okay.

   “Come on, kid, just do it.”

   Dipper grit his teeth, eyes still darting for an escape, but the three jocks had him surrounded. With his luck, he should have known better than to try to take a shortcut to his next class. Now he was trapped and probably about to get his ass handed to him.

   “You’re supposed to be smart,” the tallest of the three leered. “So you know the smart thing to do is just agree. Right?”

   “I’m not doing you’re homework for you,” Dipper spat before he could think better of it. “If you’re too stupid to do it yourself then you shouldn’t be in school to begin with.” 

   The wind was suddenly knocked out of him as a fist connect with his stomach, back hitting against the lockers behind him from the impact. As he bent over in pain, he could hear the jocks laugh to themselves. “Wrong answer, Dipshit,” the one that had thrown the punch replied. Dipper closed his eyes, bracing for the onslaught that was to come. Bill had been rubbing off on him, but in this instance he wished he had managed to keep some form of restraint. This was going to hurt.

   When the next punch didn’t land, he tentatively opened his eyes, only to widen them in surprise as the jock that had harmed him sprawled suddenly to the floor, the other two looking just shocked. The reason for this was suddenly clear as Dipper noticed none other than Bill Cipher standing in front of them, hands on his hips and a grin on his face that didn’t quite reach his uncovered eye.

   “Now gentlemen,” he said, his voice like ice as he stepped slowly forward. “While I can easily imagine idiotic meatsacks such as yourselves making a wide variety of mistakes in your pitiful lifetimes, this is one I would have thought you’d be smart enough not to make.”

   “What the hell are you talking about, Cipher?” one of the two jocks still up demanded, stepping forward in a menacing way. Bill barely payed him any attention, but when the jock stepped to close he suddenly lashed out, the satisfying crunch of bone under his fist alerting him to the broken nose his punch had just delivered to the asshole.

   “It’s rude to interrupt, do pay attention,” Bill scoffed, wiping his hand on his jeans. “Now, as I was saying, of all the things you shouldn’t do in your short time on this floating bit of space rock, the most important one is: Never,” he stepped closer to the boy still on the floor. “Touch.” His grin widened. “What’s.” He stepped down on the juncture between the jock’s open legs. “ ** _Mine_**.” He applied more pressure, enjoying watching the pathetic boy squirm in pain. “Got it?”

   The jock was quick to nod, trying hard not to move under Bill’s foot. Satisfied, Bill stepped back, laughing in amusement as the three dumb-asses made their escape, running down the hall and disappearing around the corner. Once they were gone, his expression softened as he finally looked back to the brunette. “Geeze, Pine Tree, I leave you alone for half a day and you still somehow manage to play the damsel in distress. What’ll you do without me?”

   Dipper had watched silently the entire time, face slowly going red as Bill spoke, trying not to let the butterflies run rampant at his friend’s words. Bill had always been a little possessive over him and his sister, a firm believer in protecting what was ‘his’. It didn’t mean anything beyond that. Really.

   Looking away, Dipper finally sighed, “I thought I told you to stop calling other human beings ‘meatsacks’.”

   Bill just laughed, clapping an arm around Dipper’s shoulder. “You’re a riot, y’know that?”

   Dipper just shook his head, trying to keep a blush from fully taking over his face. “What’re you doing here anyway?” he asked suddenly. “I thought you were sick today or something.”

   “Oh, that,” Bill waved a hand dismissively, looking off to the side. “Just a little business that took me longer to deal with then expected. Nothing for you to worry your pretty little mind over, Pine Tree.”

   “Pretty?” Dipper repeated in confusion, face still red.

   “ANYWAY now that that’s all over with,” Bill suddenly shouted, causing the brunette to flinch, “How’s about you and I hightail it out of here, spend the afternoon learning some REAL stuff? I found this place in the woods that seems pretty supernatural.” He waggled his eyebrows at that, and Dipper couldn’t help but chuckle at that. While he usually refused to do anything as bad as deliberately skip school, the day had been shitty enough as it was. Who was he to pass up an afternoon spent with his favourite person?

   “Sounds like an adventure.”

 

~,~’~,~’~,~’~,~

 

   Long after, when the sun had long since set and Mabel had chewed him out pretty good for ditching without telling her first, Dipper finally found himself back in his room, smile wide on his face as he flopped down on the bed. The afternoon with Bill had definitely made up for the horrible day he’d started off with.

   Rolling over, he reached into his backpack to pull out his adventure journal, ready to update it with all of the things they’d found in the woods that day. When he felt a thick piece of paper, he frowned. Pulling out the foreign thing, he stared as he found himself holding a black card with weird symbols drawn on the front, a triangle and a pine tree the only ones who could clearly make out. Opening it cautiously, he read the contents and immediately blushed.

   Things definitely weren’t as bad as he’d thought.

 

_“Roses are red_

_Violets aren’t blue,_

_The universe is a hologram,_

_But not my feelings for you.”_

_-B.C_

**Author's Note:**

> Kinda managed to mash Day 1 and Day 2 of blip week and I STILL managed to be a week late. I try, I swear...


End file.
